the penis envy

it’s the best gadget that was ever designed.

let’s face it:

first of all, it’s resizable. it’s this small funky little thing in one moment and get’s huge the other. well ok, every now and then there are faulty products, but overall it has a pretty high score to get there: only 31 pumps. can you believe it? 31. well, one of course wishes there was a settings button where the speed could sometimes be re-adjusted but i mean come on, 31 is not a bad number at all!

it’s pocket size and it’s user-friendly. wait, actually it is a true friend, not just friend-ly. it’s like carrying your best friend with you everywhere! even to bed when there is a hot woman waiting for you there. i don’t know what could top that, really. you get excited and it gets excited with you. you keep it cool, it acts like it’s not even there.

looking at it from an entrepreneur’s point of view, it helps you sell more products. you put a rubber on it and it gets a strawberry taste. a new one and it’s a banana. make it in plastic and plug it in, there, you got yourself a joystick.

and above all it’s multi-functional! it holds your brain, it works like a water sprinkle and with small additions it could easily be used in many different areas of life: to wipe tables, to draw crooked lines, as a remote control, a hat hanger, you name it!

uffff of course, i am jealous of it.

of couuuuurse i am!

not

 

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