stop asking for photos

those of you who write “if you have no photo do not even bother saying hi to me” in your profiles…and the ones that ask for a photo after a quick hello how are you….annnnd the ones who ask for two photos in a row (to make sure you are talking to a real person) i have a few words for you.

you have probably been to a horrible blind date before or you fear that the person you are talking to is a sick old man jerking off or you simply do not want to waste your time talking with an “ugly woman”-that’s pretty clear. anyone who has been to a similar situation could easily empathize with you.

but i won’t.

i can’t understand how any human being could approach another like this, ever. even if it’s a chat room, which i think is not an excuse at all. i mean, do you ever go to a supermarket and avoid the cashier because she is ugly? a colleague that wants to befriend you? do you refuse to listen to an ugly waitress when she is telling you what’s on the menu? -you must have a tough life!

i can hear you saying “but i am not there to sleep with those people”-and in fact that is even more disgusting than classifying people as ugly and not ugly according to your own standards. because it tells me that you are thinking about fucking me at hello. it’s what you are after. and in which case, you and the sick old man jerking off-the one that you have been running away from- are actually in the very same category. at least we know that he is sick. and he is old, so he probably can’t get any, hence he jerks off. he has a point! what’s yours?

and those of you who feel safe after seeing 3 photos: i have approximately 300 photos on my computer that belongs to my exes, taken at different times. next time you come accross me in a chat room i could be a mexican, a norwegian, a spaniard, an irish, an english, an american…you name it-i can be it. and you wouldn’t even notice, believe me. one could be good at this shit if one wanted to. there is no way you can be 100% safe in the world of the internet. not when there is a program out there called photoshop, anyways. so take it easy.

please, do us all a favor and learn to trust people.

you may have wondered at least once why women in certain areas of the world do not have profile photos in lesbian-themed sites. you may have asked yourself “but how is that ever possible to get to know each other if they have no photos!! is that ever possible??”

it is possible.

those women TALK. they talk to each other. they ask each other questions. they find out about each other: their hobbies, their careers, families, dreams, likes…they talk about life. they share life. and they are able to do it regardless of the looks. if they had had the chance they would probably post their photos, but since they can’t they make the best out of the situation. and frankly speaking, i appreciate them very much. for being brave enough to meet a total stranger and bringing their guards down a bit-just for the sake of getting to know a new soul.

you do not have to know the looks of someone to get to know them.

you do not  have to fuck someone to care about them.

therefore, you do not need the photo of someone to talk to them.

amen.

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